I'm so sorry.

Dadideer, Bayoot! I knew it, I've done something wrong. I'm so sorry! I've realized everything. 

I love you soo much. 

 I know what I said hurt you deeply bayoot. The moment those words left my lips I knew that I couldn't act fast enough to retract them. Your reaction was justified. If someone whom I cared about had said such things to me, I would have reacted the same way. "I'm sorry" doesn't seem to be adequate. I wish I knew how to say it better. I've relived that moment over and over and wondered how I could have been so insensitive. I don't think I have ever been so disappointed in myself. I hate hearing you cry because of what I said to you. I'm nervous about asking you to forgive me. I'm sure that you've suffered a great deal because of me, and asking for forgiveness is so much to ask from you. I also know that you might find it hard to believe my promise that I will learn from my mistake and never repeat it. I truly never want to put our relationship on the line again. I hope you will believe that dadi. 

Right now, I believe in "US" dadi, because of our past ability to work through our problems. I know we have never faced a challenge so difficult before, but I feel that we have been with each other long enough to know how to try. We know how to lift each other, forgive each other, and end up stronger. That ability can only come from love. And that is what I feel for you—a love than is deeper than I have ever known; a love that can close this wound. Though I've said that I don't feel the love anymore, but honestly, I knew that deep inside it is still you whom this confuse heart is beating for. I am sorry. I don't want you to think that I'm saying those words lightly. I really mean them. I am so sorry. I know that what I did was wrong and I know that it hurt you deeply. I'm not sure what I was thinking, but I do know that I never wanted to hurt you. I wish I could take it back, but I can't. All I can do is try to show you how much I regret what I've done and ask for your forgiveness.

I love you—please believe me. I love you for your giving nature, for talking about dreams and fears and hopes and hurts. We've shared so much. I love you. We have certainly had our share of problems in the past, but we've always been able to work through them. I think we're actually stronger because of them. I hope that this situation is no different. Dadi, I will do whatever it takes for you to trust me again, so that we can go back to the way things were. Let's share healing, too. I promise you will find a better me dadideer.

Bayoot? We've had too many good times together to break up over this. I take full responsibility for my mistake, so please don't give up on me now. I promise. 

Remember the good times like when we spent one week at MVC together? Is it soo amazing? Remember how happy we were? I know it can be that way again. Please forgive me.

I want to see you this weekend. I want to start making it up to you. I will wait for you here dadideer. I love you soo much 

Sincerely Sorry,

Uyaab Mami Shang2